Today I officiated at the wedding of one of my grandchildren. I officiated at weddings for my children, and now have exceeded that number in my grandchildren. If I survive for a few more years I will be prospect to officiate for more than one of my great-grandchildren. Having me do the honors has become something of a tradition for some members of our family. Most of my near descendants are males. In more than seventy years I have had many weddings, and each has been different from any other even with the standard repetitions found in the American Christian tradition. The repetition of the differences would make an interesting tale, much of it humorous. I have the honor of having my name on the marriage licenses of many couples I love personally.
We are a family in the biblical concept of the institution, the oldest of mankind. The family is the most dynamic and persistent parable of Scripture. Even the book of Genesis is written in the family idiom with six families dominating: Adam and Eve; Noah’s family; Abraham and Sarah; Isaac and Rebekah; Jacob and his wives; and, Joseph in Egypt. The pattern was continued through Moses, Joshua, various Judges and Kings, with singled out personal illustrations in Esther and the King, Ruth and Boaz, and Mary and Joseph in parental identity with Jesus, forming the holy family. The idealism and parable are singled out in passages from Romans and Ephesians in which human marriage is related to the spiritual marriage of Christ and his Church. It is identified as a mystery. That heightens meaning and search to discover meaning. The practicality is that in a Christian marriage the couple finds a model in Christ for the Groom, and in the Church for the bride – as Christ is and the Church projected. God forms a spiritual union with his creation.
In the analogy there is permanence, love, caring (which is love at work), and those features found in the Fruit of the Holy Spirit relating to love, mercy, longsuffering, peace, kindness and the like. In sum the Christian is dedicated to service, which service begins with one’s mate and family. (Unmarried persons are not ruled out, and they ought to maintain paternal/maternal family in adult life, or in some figure thereof, as found in mentoring.) I wanted to serve my wife more than any other person in the world, and I admit that I preferred to be served by her than by anyone else. I preferred her prepared meals over any others. Since her death my children have, each in his or her own way and with their mates, taken up that spirit for me, which makes life full and comforting – even in the necessary absence of their mother. Yonder is reunion. During the more than seventy years since my wedding day what have I discovered about a family as close knit as ours? I discovered that it is a great gift, offering basic clues to our meaning. We chose the ideal model for marriage and the family by taking on the biblical analogy by which to live. We could have chosen some other model. There are others noted even in Scripture, but none higher than this one. Even those unclear about their commitment to Jesus Christ have recognized the beauty and ongoing value of building families in the Christian context. Once clear about what is Christian, we practice our responsibility and leave matters in the hands of God. We accept each other, pray for, and are hospitable (available) to each other in love. What we have done, in varying emphasis, is to live the spiritual relationship of Christ with his Church. (Ephesians 5:21-33) It is a model all could follow, but it takes commitment above mankind’s ordinary resources. In cultivation of the biblical family we learn something about acceptance, about love to service, about taking our burdens off of others, of making life into relationships. Relationship is something to remember for attention. Jesus came to mankind for immortal relationship. *Mark W. Lee, Sr. — 2016, 2020