Self Awareness

There is a vital insight in humanity that needs to be a part of parenting education to be well introduced to children beginning in lower school grades.  It should be formed in positive perceptions, and with something of wonder that every person forms differently in the course of life – taking influence from a number of directions.  Genetic structure plays a part for good and ill, as do experience, education, models, energy, inclinations, habits, accidents, friends, family, generation shifting and other factors in each human life.  (Even gossip can be large influence in these other factors.)  If we knew enough we would find that each person is unique in some way from all other persons who relate to that person.  Even identical twins, often studied, are discovered to have differences between them, although quite commonly fewer differences than those found in their siblings and others they meet in life.  How these differences are managed by both the persons themselves and those with whom they relate becomes vital to continuing human relationships.  Relationships are important to persons for balance, sense of belonging, fulfillment of meaning, even defining some understanding of relationship with God.  The differences are both beneficial to us, but often divisive. They not only become strong factors in our thought and conduct, they can divide us from those we love and care about, perhaps causing dilution in love and care.  We see this factor in broken marriages, tension in families, incompetence in working with colleagues – and the negative story can be extended.

There are numerous words used to lump persons into groups relating to a dominant feeling about major identities of differences.  They are geeks.  They are too religious (religiosity).  They are eggheads.  They are fags.  They are reclusive.  They are poor white trash.  They live on the other side of the tracks.  This litany can be extended, but the point is made.  It may be a silent point that we have made entirely on our own, and unknown to those we meet fitting one or more of the categories that negate people so that we are unwilling to listen to them, unwilling to include them so to strengthen the good in them, and weaken that which does not serve well.  Even unwilling to recognize that there are some affirmative persons in every context that do not match the forms we prefer, we become weaker in our own context by adopting a kind of arrogance that may put us in a holier than thou attitude.  We have, in such instances, adopted the belief that we are better than they are, and deserve the privilege of gaining a somewhat higher status in the world.  This scenario has played out for some centuries in India where the untouchables were lumped together and kept in their place.  We are pleased that there are persons addressing the dark context with some success.

Christianity addresses these personal and important issues not only in Scripture, but in the acceptance of Jesus in modelled experience.  Jesus accepted persons even when he did not approve them.  History notes that persons divided from each other because of race, gender, nationality/tribe, ages, wealth, royalty and even in conditions of health.  Jesus accepted them all.  He healed those that came to him, answered questions from rich and poor, and took children in his arms for blessing while some elders must have fumed about delay.  He talked to a Samaritan woman much married, and currently living with another man without ceremony.  Even the disciples would avoid the woman because she was a Samaritan – not because they were concerned about virtue.  The carnality of her life offered some reason to pass her by – but that was not the point.  They may have been a bit embarrassed at Jesus for the event.  Jesus, accepting the woman, listening to her, offered her a way to rise out of the spiritual squalor of her life. (John 4:7-27)

Our first solution to the matter is to understand ourselves.  Why do we admit this or that, and why do we refuse this or that?  Do we truly love the persons before us enough to set aside the knowledge that they may be sinful, boring, arrogant, silent, garrulous, too old/too young, cheats, misleaders, even angry?  In gracious (prayerful) spirit we act to draw out the best from the persons with whom we have to do, and offer our best inclusions.  We should avoid the put-down.  We are grateful for those who permitted both of us to be ourselves, especially when the occasion offered better feelings, perceptions, conduct lifting lives.