Self-Esteem

An open secret to inner peace is to believe in ourselves: that we are maturing in the direction and context that truly perceptive mankind and God holds for us.  There is so large a context revealed to us, that we may take it as the basic order for gaining appropriate self-esteem and a belief that life will finish well.  There is a self-esteem that relates to earth life (temporary) of human beings but aided in a larger esteem (permanent) that is summarized in the word: immortality.  As we evolve in life from infancy our self-esteem (sense of well-being and worth-competency) ought to be engendered early from the parenting skills of our mothers and fathers.  That life context is cultivated in us by those (parents or parent figures) nurturing us in nature, and spiritual well-being is cultivated in us by our spiritual Father, Son and Holy Spirit (divine parenting).  Both contexts require knowledgeable persons acting in love (respect) and motivated to build mature persons from immature ones. Scripture identifies spiritual maturity as the high goal of persons in the course of their natural lives.  It incorporates the physical maturity found in the course of living in nature to form the holistic person (thoroughly furnished and wise) that God is looking for in virtually every person. 

Whatever is the evaluation of the person about self, the divine perception of maturity is rather universally honored by those who have engaged it.  That large affirmation ought to be persuasive enough about the whole matter.  To achieve it is to have humility of early dependence on the parental figures of our lives, and to find obedience to proper discipline that leads to self-fulfillment.  It is, I believe, one of the main reasons that God, in his commandments, informs us to respect our parents.  The stories of adopted children, many known to me including members of my family, make strong evidence for what is written here.  The general public may little realize how great it is for some adopted persons to get the feeling of well-being settled within self.  Their sense of worth may begin with the question: Why was I separated from my birth parents? In any event, with effective parents or poorly functioning parents, we must eventually take on the responsibility for ourselves.  Therein is wisdom against excuses.  It is found in our proficiency in work; in loving and being loved; in respect from groups with which we identify; and, in moral uprightness.  Our gratification with life and ourselves turn on that quartet, and crowned with the identification for our moral being in righteousness.  Christians, if well informed, know that the heavenly Father assists in accomplishing the objective from persons plagued with temptation to inferiority.  We can become the persons we ought to be.  That requires some effective hold on the heavenly vision that inspires prayer, obedience to the affirmations of Scripture, and the monitoring of our lives for direction. We call this last conscience, but conscience has to be instructed and find the context of the other helps.  It all appears to be exotic and complicated until tried and put into practice.  In practice it seems hard, but simple enough.

The above, if true, suggests several ideas which need to be consciously engaged in our thinking about life and self-worth.  A main factor is that it begins early to be most easily engaged.  Those who found faith early, duty early, meaningful work early, righteousness early, and love early appear to have greater success and a sense of fulfillment in who they are and what they become.  They find their way rather well whether prince or pauper.  They find a beautiful world whether educated or denied/evading formal education.  They learn that love belongs to all, even the persons cut off from normal patterns for life as from a parental home or some other physical omission in their lives.  In other words, the matter rests ultimately in self – themselves.  God has offered solutions to the denials of nature in the person who seeks the affirmative life. It seems almost impossible for me to describe the beauty of the affirmative life.  Refuse the negative. Embrace the eternal yes for life.  When I encounter those who live in the fears of life’s negatives and making some proposal, I either ask them, or want to: How do you cast that into an affirmative for life?  It isn’t long after challenge that they are smiling and we get on, at least with a pleasant exchange that makes life seem better.  The news is better than the media expresses it.  Families are better than current culture suggests.  Hope and solutions are just around the corner – if we turn the corner.  Seek and find.