During the writing of these Pages, one of my daughters-in-law sent the following to me during several days when I was contemplating human thought processes, patterns and conclusions – especially related to the mass of contradiction/paradox factors in our lives. The following is almost entirely related to that small document sent to her by her brother. I have made a few slight edits so as to emphasize my purpose.
With a raised glass of water a conference leader walked through a room illustrating a point in stress management to an audience. Everyone knew she was going to ask the ultimate question: Is it half empty of half full? She surprised them with: How heavy is this glass of water? Answers were called out ranging from 8 oz. to 20 oz. She responded by saying: The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute it is light. If I hold it for an hour my right arm will ache. If I hold it for a day, you’ll have to call an ambulance. In each case it’s the same weight, but the longer I hold it the heavier it gets. She continued: And that’s the way it is with stress. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later as they become increasingly heavier, we won’t be able to carry them. As with the glass of water, you have to put it down before holding it again. When we’re refreshed, we can carry on with the burdens – holding stress longer and better each time we practice setting them down. Don’t carry them through the evening into the night. . . .Pick them up tomorrow if they are real. Study how to drop them if they are not.
- Accept that some days you’re the pigeon, and some days you’re the statue.
- Keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
- Read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
- Drive carefully . . . It’s not only cars that can be recalled by their Maker.
- Have the decency to be vague if you can’t be kind.
- Lend someone twenty dollars, and if you never see them again it was worth it.
- Serve as a warning to others so to complete what may be your sole purpose in life.
- Buy only a car that you can push.
- Avoid putting both feet in your mouth, or you will not have a leg to stand on.
- Do your dance in life – few persons care that you may not dance well so just get up and dance.
- Sleep late – the early worm gets eaten by the early bird.
- Wait a bit – the second mouse gets the cheese.
- Choose the right lane – when everything’s coming your way you’re in the wrong lane.
- Celebrate birthdays – the more you have the longer you live.
- Admit openly some of your mistakes, some of which are too much fun to make only once.
- Learn from crayons – some are sharp and dull, with weird names and different colors in the same box.
- Become truly happy so to enjoy the scenery on a detour.
- Having an awesome day is partly gained from the loving thought of you by someone today.
- Save the earth . . . . It’s the only planet with chocolate.
Do I agree with all the above guidelines for life? I would not without some explanation and context. From one point of view some would be just silly or contradictory for the good life. If they are offered in the sense that we should not take ourselves too seriously in the context of our daily lives, the list becomes useful, and in a spirit of cleverness points to some important approaches to ourselves, to others and to problems. Persons who can adapt to the above in the spirit of human freedom, and through suggestion find a way to live with less stress, not in contradiction but in paradox – perhaps the hope for a pleasant earth experience has been won. The happy people I know, and persons who are simply pleasant to be around find the above to be helpful and to put daily experience into context. The person determines from within if tension or sorrow, if problems and accidents, if losses and misunderstandings are going to take away life.
*Mark W. Lee, Sr. — 2016, 2020